Cats versus kids
I was going to start this as a response to a comment in the previous entry, but thought I was on a roll…
So I now have a growing list of reasons to have children, most of them not positive:
Have a kid to wash my car, do other chores. Thanks to Matt. And I guess to my parents, though I can’t quote them on that.
Have a kid or several kids to get breaks on tuition. Thanks to my brother. Too bad I don’t need breaks on tuition any more. Do you get breaks if you’re in a master’s or doctorate program? Anyone, anyone?
Have kids for tax reasons. Also thanks to brother.
Have kids because I always wanted a sister. Thanks to my dad, after I pestered him for several years, especially after he got remarried. Told me if I wanted a baby, I should go have one. I never thought I’d hear my dad telling me to get knocked up. Anyway, I wanted a sister, not a daughter. And now my brother has got the niece thing covered.
Have kids to enrich my life. Oh, tons of people, but I have yet to believe them.
On my list of reasons to stay with cats:
This could probably bounce off Heather’s Cats vs. Plants: An Objective Analysis entry.
They don’t require their own college tuition. Me.
They don’t need clothes. Also me.
Don’t talk back. Me again.
Provide unreserved love, make me feel better when I’m unhappy. No awkward teenage years. Me.
Cuddly and don’t outgrow it. Me.
They don’t do chores, unfortunately. How many times have I asked the cats to do their own cat litter? Or wash some dishes?
Kids are a source of unreserved love as well, at least until they’re about five or six, and maybe for awhile after that. There is nothing that makes your heart ache more than having your child kiss you and tell you he or she loves you.
I haven’t found that kids provide any tax relief. Maybe my wife and I make too much money to see any of those benefits. Anyway, I’d say that marriage and children actually result in an increased tax burden. I haven’t seen a tax refund check of any size since the days when I was a poor college student. Typically, we only get back about $300.00 from the state and the past two years we have had to pay that amount to the Feds. This year, we got back only seventy dollars from the IRS.
Maybe it’s the amount of money, then. You must make too much. And with that reasoning, I’d make too much too. Though, as a single parent….
Anyway, cute kids are one thing. But wait until they grow up and give you hell….
Though my dad would probably agree that his adult kids turned out all right after a few years of nastiness. Jury is still out on the stepbrother.
Combining incomes can take you up into a whole other tax bracket. It is a little perplexing, though, to hear single people talk about getting married and having kids as a form of tax relief. Unless you’re both unemployed or working minimum wage jobs, there will be no relief.
Children are a precious gift to their parents when they are young. Most then go thru their rebellious & think they know everything streak.
Children finally grow up (sometimes later then sooner) & you’re hopefully proud (I am of mine) of them.
Cats can be loving too, but if you don’t change their litterbox, they will leave you little presents, HUH MELISSA!!!!!
Well, I never said there weren’t downsides to cats. I just didn’t detail them.
And nieces and nephews can be a precious gift, or grandchildren, in your case, dad.
Mel, I like your reasons for having the cats versus having the children! You have my vote! Of course, you may have it by default since I am not ready to get “knocked-up,” as you say.
Speaking of little presents, we caught Elliot with one of Bruce’s little presents a week or so ago…just before he put it in his mouth. EWW!!!
I don’t think Bruce leaves his presents intentionally, but I could be wrong.
The think about kids is that they’re constant. While Bruce will go off and sleep in a closet for an entire day, Elliot will not (and, no, I haven’t tried this). Elliot is wonderful, but he can also be exhausting just by being “on” all the time.
On the whole, I ‘d have to say I love my son more than my cat, but I love my cat too because he’s snuggleable (what with his fur an all) in a way Elliot isn’t.
As a side note, Elliot had a cat hair goatee earlier today. He’d given Bruce a big kiss (or maybe it was a bite) on his side and ended up with a mouthful of fur which eventually settled on his chin, waited down with baby drool.
Oh, I’m glad you caught him before he put it in his mouth! Kids like to mess with the weirdest and stuff, don’t they?
My favorite cat mess is cleaning up fresh, warm throw-up. I gag in sympathy.
Dawn, no one thought you were going to just put Elliot in a closet. Unless you’re feeling defensive…?
How did Elliot feel about the cat hair goatee? Probably enjoyed the mess?
Dawn, I should hope that you love your son more than your cat; but, I should also hope that you love your cat too!
How does Bruce interact with Elliot? Are they playmates, or does he just tolerate his little human friend?
Hairballs are the little gifts I hate most. If you don’t find them in time, they stain the carpet. They are really just the most disgusting thing, though, no matter when you find them. Since our cat is a long haired cat who seems to shed constantly, no matter the season, we always have cat hair everywhere, and every month or two we wake up to a hairball on the carpet. Why can’t she cough it up on the kitchen linoleum? Hunh? Why always the carpet?
The best part: stepping on it. Or finding someone re-eating the surprise.
Are we all “cat people” here?
We are all cat people until we find hairballs, vomit, and the like. Then we become slaves to the master cat and clean up after them! It is a twisted relationship, indeed!
I think we’re all just the cat’s pets. And furniture. And toys. And food source…
But this is from a non-cat person.
Oops. Guess I should check back more often.
As to Brandi’s question, Elliot and Bruce get along pretty well, though Elliot can be a bit rough at times, but when he is, Bruce just swats him or nips at him (sometimes drawing a bit of blood, but not often) and walks away.
Lately Bruce has been sleeping ALL DAY in my wardrobe, and it worries me some. I’m not used to him being completely out of my sight, completely antisocial. Plus, he gets my clothes all hairy, but since he sleeps between dresses I never really wear, I guess that doesn’t matter so much.
Does anybody else have similar issues with their cats? The hiding all day thing? Granted, he makes up for it at 4 in the morning when he comes and wakes me up for a rubdown…
Oh, and can I just say it’s really nice to be amongst other cat people here. When I taught at Albion and was involved in a writer’s group, every person but me was a dog person (as in, really obsessed with their dogs and could talk about nothing else), and that got VERY tiring.