Jam on Bread

Our neighborhood is a strange one. The lawns are clean and close-cropped, the houses well-kept (well, ours less than most), the people smiley and friendly and touting themselves as good neighbors. Our neighbor across the street is particularly a “good neighbor,” offering us the loan of his truck, his ladder, his woodworking tools, his ravine in the back for dumping fallen limbs and leaves. Perhaps none of this is strange, sounding instead very suburban, subdivision-ish, which it is, and as we all know from movies like Edward Scissorhands and American Beauty, all is not what it would seem on the surface. This is never a surprise in movies, of course–we’ve come to expect the rot that rests below pleasant surfaces to seep out at some point or another–but in real life, it is a bit of a surprise when it happens, especially when it happens to you.
(more…)

As I’m sure I’ve mentioned, I’ve begun writing about Elliot and family history as it pertains to Autism Spectrum Disorders. Not sure exactly where it’s going to spin off from these 30 pages, but I’ve decided to post what I have should anybody feel like reading it and have thoughts/comments/”yes, keep writing!” encouragement.
(more…)

Finding Community at the Grocery Store

I got kind of carried away with my comment on my friend Kristen’s blog, so I figured I should just link to her post here

I do not write about my daughter enough. Elliot, I write about him nearly every day. When he was younger, I wrote about him on this blog and in my journal, constantly keeping up with new things he was doing and saying. When I was beginning to piece together the possibility of Elliot’s having an Autism Spectrum Disorder, I renewed my blogging about him. And now I write in Elliot’s book for school every day so that his teachers can know what he’s been up to here and so that I can respond to their notes from school, be they about troublesome behaviors or good days (which have been more frequent of late, thankfully!). I’ve even begun my Fella With An Umbrella project, of which Elliot’s a central character.
(more…)

A great Mother’s Day! Gabriel came over and spent the day with Elliot and Lucy. Here’s a clip of the two boys together, talking about living in trees

Elliot and Gabriel Talking in a Tree

It’s Facebook’s fault, really. That immediate, accessible, ever changing social networking site. I sit down at the computer, check email, check Facebook, complete stupid quizzes matching me to a decade (1970s), a Sesame Street character I am (Big Bird), a 1980s movie (Princess Bride). I leave updates about how sick I am, funny things my son has said, how I shouldn’t be on Facebook at 3 a.m. but am because my daughter has woken up and won’t go back to sleep. Sometimes I chat with an “online friend” and this is, perhaps, the best use of my Facebook time. But what I have discovered is that Facebook–its newness, hipness–has crowded out what little time I once had to keep up with my blog which is far more important to me, really, than all the Facebook quizzes put together.
(more…)

This afternoon I made the “traditional middle eastern bread” that had been requested of me for an evening church activity teaching children and their parents about communion. Being a lover of bread and its making, I’d debated what to make, thinking at first pita or some fancy Easter anise-laden bread (even though I despise anise), then deciding matzoh would be more appropriate. After all, matzoh is the bread of Passover, the unleavened bread the Jews made in their haste to flee Egypt, the bread Jesus broke and shared with his disciples at the famed Last Supper. The recipe I found in my fabulous Flat Breads and Flavors cookbook promised it would be both easy (flour + water = matzoh) and quick (Jewish custom and law dictates 18 minutes preparation time). And after a week of feeling crunched for time and pressed in by children, making something easy and quick so I could go out and write for awhile sounded pretty good. But I did not think I would be leaving the house to write about making matzoh, did not expect to feel strangely moved by the making of such a simple bread. (more…)

Kept meaning to write about Elliot’s diagnosis (received Tuesday) but haven’t. Maybe that’s because it wasn’t really a surprise to have him diagnosed with Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified. It’s a mouthful spelled out or abbreviated.

Basically he’s on the autism spectrum. Some of his scores put him closer to “autism” and some put him closer to “Asperger’s” (especially language), but however you dice it, he’s a quirky kid I’m relieved to have him diagnosed on the spectrum, even though I’m not surprised. Next step is to look into PCIT (Parent-Child Interaction Therapy) to help us work with Elliot on controlling his anger and to help us find ways to help Elliot be less rigid in his thinking and just a wee bit more compliant In another week we will be meeting with his team at school, including the principal, to discuss both his diagnosis and his continuing challenging behaviors.

Anyway, I’m hoping that this diagnosis and future meetings with his developmental pediatrician and others will keep us moving in the right direction. Still want to avoid medication if we can, but there are days…

Fortunately, today was not one of those days We had a very good family day–making scones and chai for breakfast, Biggby’s for coffee, Goodwill where we bought a pirate ship, movie time (ok, I slipped out and wrote), chicken curry for dinner. Tomorrow I hope to take Elliot swimming.

But it’s too late for somebody who has to get up super early to drive a friend (whose car is currently stalled in our driveway) to work. It’s been a good day and for now that is good enough for me.

…that is, if I’m lucky, I’ll get another hour. At least, I think that means I’ll be lucky. At any rate, I can’t sleep and I think I’ll try to articulate why that is.
(more…)

Of interesting and important events of late, I must mention that, as of Thursday, Lucy got a toddler bed frame to hold the crib mattress she’s been sleeping on for some time. I should note that she’s never actually SLEPS in a crib but is used to sleeping in a big bed, so this is sort of an in-between move. At any rate, her first night of actually sleeping in her bed came last night after a full day with me in Lansing where I met up with friends who were in town from Seattle for a death in the family.
(more…)